Tuesday, 9 August 2011

Day Nine- Over Exaggeration

Stories are the lives led, told by many. In a way it really is an inevitability to hear a story about a gig getting out of hand or a break up between two people having different stories. An example, Rhys Ifans was recently arrested at comic-con because he allegedly pushed a female security guard. One site went with, he pushed her because she wasn’t letting a member of his party in, another, and I’m not naming names (it rhymes with Da Bum) said he punched her, and I remember reading one saying “Rhy’s Ifans batters security guard because he hates America”. Some say that’s just a different side of the story, I just say you got to take what quite a lot of people say with a skip full of salt these days. This is due to the rising level of intolerance for boredom and the desire for excitement. Don’t believe me, look at the levels the media scoop down to too get what is led to believe as exciting news. As much I do love a bit of side boob, I really do not want to see it on a wedding photo of a celebrity, no matter how drunk he looks. And neither am I going to be able to admire that side boob on his voicemail!

Before you get your pants in a twist or you loosen the belt wrapped around your sock, of course people back in the day used to over exaggerate, Christopher Columbus only went to Swansea! What I’m trying to say is, over exaggeration is becoming the forefront of life because people are surrounded by so many stories of success and tragedy. Envy is bound to poke its hideous spot filled face. So much so that these people feel they want similar success and in quite a lot of cases, the tragedy!

Exaggeration in Facebook *face palm* (contains the explanation to GFY acronym)
The amount of people I’ve had to not only hide posts on facebook but also delete them (from life mwahaha) is ridiculous. All because of there incessant attention-seekingly overexaggerated posts. I have lists of examples, all of them tragedy because they are the most annoying, posted all over facebook. I’m not complaining if you posted a status because you are upset and it’s the only way you can get your voice heard, fair enough, I understand that. But if you mould the truth to make it seem a whole lot bigger and worse so the opposing person looks like an arse face and you get all the sympathy/attention because you’ve made it seem you’re the victim, go f*ck yourself. (To be honest, if you do actually manage to f*ck yourself, then you might actually have a good facebook status to put).

I’m bored of the typical shit like “OMG ALL MEN ARE THE SAME I CANT BELIVE HE DID THAT”. No Amy, not all men are the same, some of them have vaginas as well. In Spain they are called “solo pero afortunado” which means alone but lucky (innovators of the GFY crew).

“JUST GAVE MANAGERIAL TIPS TO KENNY DAGLISH, HE SHOOK MY HAND” No Kevin, you work at tk Max and you’ve never left Edgware, sit down. Anyway enough on facebook, I’ll leave that to another blog seeing as though I’ve got x amount to do over the coming weeks.

Understanding a problem but fear of ridicule
Over exaggeration is comprehensible if you want people to understand a problem, but you don’t want to be ridiculed for your sensitivity towards the matter. But I truly do believe it’s a downward spiral.

Close to the knuckle count down (they get more serious and dark the higher the number)

ONE: the more you over exaggerate the more you start to believe the situation is worse then it seems. If you constantly tell yourself “OMG I’m never going to see my friends again cause they live so far away and they hate me and a few of them are going to Jurassic Park” then you will start to believe it and it will get you down. Also, if you start complaining about something similar to a friend, then a week later your friend finds out that you’re seeing your pals on Friday because Jurassic Park wasn’t actually as far away as you made yourself believe, then they are going to start getting tired of your shit. Especially if the friend has spent an hour chatting to you saying “ don’t be sad, I’m sure you will see them soon”, not that I’m speaking from personal experience.

TWO: People who here the actual truth, followed with hard proof of the situation you have over exaggerated, will start calling you a liar liar pants on fire, or a variation involving swear words. Or sign language if your hearing impaired and they are very dedicated to getting there point across.

THREE: You want a good story that won’t bite you in the anoose? Tell a truthful and realistic one. Yeah you could tell an over exaggerated story that involves explosions, drugs, the police and nipples (or whatever variation) and yeah people might actually be interested in your self-convinced “eventful life”. But are they interested in you? Hell no, they are interested in the brand your creating of yourself. If they then go out with you expecting a Skins meets Harry Potter and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas kind of night, only to find out you can’t drink alcohol, you’re inadequate with a wand and you can’t have an extra slice of space cake because your mum is scared that you will gain diabetes, they’ll possibly be slightly disappointed.

FOUR: Be you, who really cares if you’re boring or you’re not crazy or you can’t beat a friends story to impress or garner there love and attention. Isn’t the fact that you’re alive enough? Isn’t the beauty of capability, whether it be small or large, enough? Yeah I understand a story consisting of I breathed in then I breathed out” might not thrill you. But don’t twist that story into “I breathed in, then my suicidal tendencies to which I have gained because a friend of mine garnered so much attention from her attempt kicked in, then I fainted and through the powers to which my cheating ex couldn’t understand, even though he left me because of my whoreish behaviour, jumped in and miraculously, I breathed out”. First of all, you don’t even have a friend who attempted anything of the sort so stop telling yourself that you sick bizarre puppy! And if you faint because you held your breathe in for so long, it shows that you’re an idiot and the fantastic power of instinct jumped in. Who the hell needs the friends that will come with over-exaggeration, they are empty vessels that you will eventually become, with the more lies you cocoon yourself in to stay away from the crushing reality that monotony is part of life. Even Hayley Williams or Samuel L Jackson have dull days!

Tragedy is nothing to want, it’s a destroyer of man. If you’re over exaggeration is a cover up for your insecurity, because you don’t think you have amounted to anything. Then go and amount to something instead of making people think you have. You won’t believe what you are capable of, with a little bit of drive and perseverance.




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