Ah god, he's back doing Blogs again- Anti-Climax and What I'm Up To.

Introduction

Fuck the system.

Right well, look at me, I’m back doing ze blogs! Everyone happy? Not if you were/will be offended by my blogs. Which I find quite funny, seeing as though I don’t normally address a specific person in my blogs, but more the act of said “wrong-doing”. To be offended by it is to admit you’ve done it before, am I right? Anyway, so I’m back, going to be trying to do this once a week at the least, it’s something to keep the mind from letting go (No Jack no! Keep holding on, rescue will be here soon). So this blog will be about what I’ve got planned and the true way of living in a world of the anti-climax! If that doesn’t sound exciting enough, here’s some space created with the space bar                      !

I’m Sorry, I Seem to of Anti-Climaxed an Old Person on you

If you need a definition towards an anti-climax, watch England play football. Too sporty for you? Buy anything with the word “super” in it, or this blog. I live a life of the anti-climax, as an actor I go to castings for (mostly) amazing projects and then not get them. But without the slight hope or dream of getting it, there really isn’t any point of trying out for it.

Something I’ve found to be an anti-climax (to no fault of it’s own) is Twitter. I thought it’d be magnificent, as a friend of mine convinced me it’s the greatest thing in the world (which wasn’t hard to do as I was previously blown away by the invention of trampoline walls (they are just trampolines placed at an angle, but still!)).

I wouldn’t have joined the lovely world of Twitter if someone hadn’t told me it’s the greatest thing since sliced Gerbil. So imagine my dismay when it didn’t live up to the hype and was a huge anti-climax in comparative to how he was describing it. It is no where near as great as people say it is, but, I still like it. Yes, things like toast, Twitter, Colin Farrell’s acting and Sportsdirect.com can be overhyped, but they are still good enough to look at (and maybe taste? The toast anyway, Twitter would taste like girl sweat for teenage celebrities and Robbie Savage’s tears). I’ve even started using Twitter properly, with hash tags and everything, but so far I haven’t really seen a solid reason to use them, as I’m not a 1direction or Justin Beeballs fan.

It is either people are becoming fantastic promoters or I just have quite a high idea of things that’d be rated a 10/10. But it’s not like I hate everything, or think everything that has ever been made is a dirty shit-eater. It’s not like that at all, I’m very happy about most things in life, in fact, I’m a firm believer that Doritos are perfect and my fat ipod is the best Ipod I can get (on that note, R.I.P Steve Jobs).

Yes, maybe everything is an anti-climax in a way, but what would be the point of having any adventure in life if everything was perfect?

Life, Life Life Life

Talking about anti-climaxes! I’ve got a little game for you all. I recently did the promo (with other people of course) for the new Derren Brown show. According to a few of my lovely supportive friends, the advert is now live on telly, so if anyone else finds it, tell me so I can watch it on +1! (YouTube isn’t the same). But that isn’t the game! Apparently there are going to be billboards that have my face in it, if you can get a photo of one, or you pointing at one, or multiple posters in different places, or a tiny cat sunbathing on the shell of a turtle, then you will win a prize! Haven’t thought about what it is, but it will happen!

Things I’ve got planned? Well I’m going to be doing this every week, maybe every Thursday? Will see, but! Here is the news that some of you will be excited for, others would probably be a bit confused by it. I’ve recently bought the devices/software to record me playing video games (stay with me, like my wife). So I’ll be putting up footage of me playing video games up on YouTube, with voiceover/narration by myself. So basically, I will be treating it as a podcast with maybe some comments on how the game footage is going. It’s another platform for me as I am a regular player of games and I like to joke around, so I don’t see why I shouldn’t combine the two and potentially earn money from it (get enough views on your YouTube channel and you start being paid for advertisement and such, so much so that you could probably gain the equivalent monthly earnings of working a 5hour job everyday, why aren’t other people doing this!). So if you are interested in games, watch and listen, if you don’t like games but like a good joke in a short podcast format, have my voice in the background while you are on facebook or whatever it is you people do. It’s a win win situation for me, and you!

Also, I do photography properly now, so if anyone reading needs headshots then I suggest you get in contact with me and we will talk prices, mine are ridiculously cheap, for now!

Sean, what are you doing with all this money? Is it going towards anything? Cocaine mainly. That and I’m saving up to moving out and I want to try and get an agent in America (through going there after getting in contact with agents that desire to use my face, not by buying myself into one, never do that, it’s a scam!) without borrowing money from my lovely parents.

Summary

Will do a blog about the Derren Brown Promo, it was a prime example of why I’m terrible at dance and how Derren Brown could potentially hate me for accidently sounding sarcastic.

Also I’m going to be doing a blog about my adventures in “improving” myself. I know, I’m as worried as you are.

Plus! Expect a very ranty blog about those who think it’s there right to feel they are better then others even though they haven’t accomplished anything! Needless to say, it potentially could be awesome, or an anti-climax (it all comes full circle, bit like a wank in a roundabout, have you missed me?).

Day Twenty-Three- Blaming Past Sean and the Book Of Anger!

Introduction

I’m football crazy! Football mad! I’d spend time watching it if I had a dad (I have a dad). Now to try and power through another one of these blogs, can’t believe it’s the 24^th day! Nearly done, then I could probably do a blog a week as I’ve actually quite enjoyed this. I have plenty of plans that I will reveal on the final days if you haven’t been listening to the podcast, all to which are schemes that licence testing. I also hit 500 views on my blog a day ago, so very happy about that! This blog is going to be about a little character called, Past Sean.

Past Sean is a Big Dick

I’m not talking about regretting my past, nothing like that. But the small choices or lazy moments that have then forced me to pick up the slack later down the road. Just looking at the bass I’ve never used which clutters my room makes me annoyed at "past Sean". I also bought a leather jacket that I never wear because it’s too much of a statement. I can’t be put in the bracket of emo rocker because I have a tendency to be happy and I love a cartwheel from time to time. But it even gets smaller then that, I’ve had to clean out mouldy cups from my room and have even nearly drunk out of them in the middle of the night.  All these things have been caused from "Past Sean"! I even think like that a bit now, I have a collection of bent and tattered photos on my wall that I had called the Happy Wall (this isn’t an attempt at a melodramatic metaphor I promise) but now all the photos are falling off and I’m tending to find them in strange places (had one stuck to my back for a few hours!). I would sort it out but I’m going to leave it for future Sean, for when he gets so annoyed at finding another photo in his boxers (ballbag paper cut anyone?).

I also once found a half eaten galaxy cake bar in my favourite bag which filled me with anger, only to remember specifically saying to myself “OK don’t forget about that”. I think referring my past mistakes as a living being kind of gives me comfort in the idea of becoming a more reliable/anal man, either that or I’m completely nuts ("Completely Nuts" being the arch nemesis of "Anal Man").

One thing I am thankful for is that I never do anything that I think I might look back on and hate in the future. Like getting a Nike tick shaved in the back of my hair or getting a piercing on my eyebrow (bellend boyband power!). One thing I think about that a friend of mine might regret is her mime video to a Disney song. If you don’t think it’s that bad then let me change that. She has edited it and done it seriously with no sense of irony or sillyness to it. She even does the lying on the bed laying her chin on her hands, then rocking her head side to side and singing. How can anyone do that without realising how silly it looks?! I think the only video I kind of look back and sigh is the video of me pulling forward one of those spring projected rocking horses in a kids playground then letting it go, smashing me in the nuts. Not because I didn’t find it funny, I did but, it just hurt so much (damn you Anal Man).

BOOK OF ANGER

My brother was cleaning out his office when he found a book I had written in. I clamoured at this book to find what significant artefacts I can find out about myself. The first few pages were a list of things I’ve got to do, all as monotonous and unexciting as the next (as a previous attempt to eradicate "Past Sean", I presume). After a few pages, I started to get bored but then I noticed a bit of writing on a completely random page (literally was about 40 pages of blank and then this). On this page I had scribbled the line “anyone who says “darling I like being fashionably late” is a gimp”. To think this book is four years old! What had angered me so much that I had to write that down!

Summary

With the current situation of mine being a little bit sporadic, I have decided to give myself a little “to do” list. Along with that, I’m giving myself points (doing this blog is worth 10, a wopping 10!)! A little sad, but I don’t have a girlfriend to sigh at me about it, so I’m going to go ahead and do it and then let Future Sean look back and think how much of a ballknuckle I am/used to be. Inception… INCEPTION… IT’S STILL SPINNING!

Podcast

http://themetaphoricalbeard.podomatic.com/entry/2011-08-17T15_09_58-07_00

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